June 2010
29 posts
On bearing arms.
Do you think America’s obsession with guns is more of a mental health issue (ie little dick syndrome or some other syndrome you deem fitting), than a question of freedom? Or is it just about the money? (apologies, but this retarded article - http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,595602,00.html - in the ‘mental health’ section of Fox News, has caused me to want to flee this country...
Jun 30th
136 notes
2 tags
On copyright law.
You post a lot of music on your personal tumblr. As a popular account, how do you deal with the copyright issue? Or do you just get permission from artists since it’s free promotion? It’s all perfectly legal, because I track down each artist and give them head before posting their music to my personal blog. It’s a little known codicil of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act...
Jun 25th
136 notes
On an unwanted pregnancy.
I’ll keep this short. I’m getting married to a man I love. Today I tested positive on a pregnancy test. Yesterday at our rehearsal, he publicly told a large group of friends and family of how unstable this stage of his life was and he wants to wait 8+ years to start a family. Please give me your shadiest raging bitchy advice. Like you, I don’t have religion tying me back from...
Jun 25th
On my varied interests.
you know, the only stuff you really talk about is sex, racist and feminist america. No, no. The only stuff you read about is sex, racism, and feminism. Don’t blame your narrow focus on me. It’s not my fault you’re not interested in drugs, love, and the meaning of life with a little pop culture and anti-authoritarian shit talk thrown in for good measure. Expand your horizons.
Jun 24th
71 notes
1 tag
On fun sized advice.
Do you make any money from blogging? Not a fucking nickel. What is the difference between “fucking” and “making love?” Hallmark. How do you deal with pretentious assholes? Relentless mind fucking followed by total disregard. What do you think of Dr. Phil? I don’t think of him. Ever. I can’t stop fucking procrastinating. Try putting it off for a few days. ...
Jun 24th
158 notes
On the thought of it.
I am a hetero-flexible gal in a serious long term relationship with a guy who I love with all of my goddamn heart.  We have tons of fun together and the sex is amazing.  I am incredibly happy. But, and there is always a but: I would really really like to have a threesome or get some action with another female.  I’m not interested in dating/loving/pursuing a woman but I just love fooling...
Jun 24th
69 notes
2 tags
On neo-marxist bullshit.
Do you believe rent to be fundamentally exploitative? Should we all have to pay for shelter simply for existing? If I dropped you off in the woods with only an axe and your bloated sense of entitlement, how long before you’d have a roof over your head? Well then, you useless fucking hippie, aren’t you lucky that you live in a civilized, post-industrial society with property rights...
Jun 23rd
330 notes
1 tag
On children of the corn.
I live in this shitty rust belt town with a population not very different from my college dorm.  Every few days, I go to town for the essentials like food, water, and vodka.  Unfortunately, it seems like you can’t go to town anymore without some stupid little urchins heckling you or something. The older ones I don’t mind as much.  Teenagers are insecure little cretins and as bad ass...
Jun 23rd
148 notes
1 tag
On a wandering eye.
My boyfriend will sometimes comment on how attractive other females (celebrities and non-celebrities). It hurts my feelings, especially because I don’t say things like “oh, that dude is sooooo hot” around him. I think it’s rude. What do you think? Dickmove, or should I get over it? If he keeps doing it despite knowing that it hurts you feelings, then yeah, it’s a...
Jun 22nd
83 notes
2 tags
On an afterlife.
Would you believe in the idea of an afterlife, or a greater meaning, if it was concurrent with everyone losing their individuality with death? Would that fit in with your worldview?  So in a sense there would be “nothing” in the great beyond, because in dying we’d lose our individuality and our entire sense of being. Your advice is so constructive and empathetic, much more so...
Jun 22nd
429 notes
1 tag
On revolution.
I’d love to get rapped up in some great revolutionary movement. Believe completely, take to the streets, kill nay-sayers, with the knowledge that it’s all for the best. But nothing has caught my fancy yet. Any suggestions? Move to Iran.
Jun 20th
12 notes
On call girl gossip.
Recently, my friends have been gossiping about the possibility a friend-of-a-friend is a call-girl. I’ve only met the girl twice and we never even see her or the friend of her’s we know, but the gossip really bothered me. I don’t really care if she is or isn’t, but it seems that if its not true it could really hurt someone’s feelings and if its true it reeks of...
Jun 18th
25 notes
1 tag
On truth.
People say I’m a bitch, but I didn’t know that speaking the truth meant bitch. People say that in order to meet guys, I need to be a nicer person; meaning fake, no one is really “nice”. Do I really want a guy that can’t handle the truth? There’s a huge difference between a strong woman who speaks the truth and a self-righteous cunt who hurts other people with...
Jun 18th
80 notes
1 tag
On secret affairs.
Here’s my dilem. I’m having a secret affair with this guy. This certain guy has hooked up with my best friend a few months ago. He confessed to me that he actually likes me and could see us being more than fuck buddies. My best friend still isn’t over him even though they never actually dated (she gave him a bj and he was high and barely remembers it). I like him so much and...
Jun 18th
9 notes
On sookie.
Among my group of friends, we have “Tara,” who is secretly fucking our other friend, “Bill.” Bill has a pregnant girlfriend, “Sookie.” Bill, Sookie, and Tara regularly socialize together with our other friends, and I feel terrible for Sookie, who is completely oblivious. I’m pretty shocked Tara would do something like this. Especially disturbing is the...
Jun 17th
29 notes
1 tag
On what's inappropriate.
I have an ex-wife. We get along all right. I see her once every few months and we have lunch and talk about our work and families and so on. I have a girlfriend. The girlfriend (who is otherwise not even remotely neurotic or whiny) seems to think that my amicable relationship with my ex-wife is inappropriate. What do you think? Inappropriate. I hate that word. It’s used by persnickety...
Jun 17th
67 notes
1 tag
On taking offense.
“Let me guess. Asian female?” What the fuck?! This illustrates your ignorance. What if this person is caucasian, african, mexican, or whatever—you’re going to deliberately label this person right off the bat? Fuck you. The fact that you put the race down in the first place is irrelevant. Fuck you and your preconceived notions. I don’t even care if you answer this; I...
Jun 16th
163 notes
1 tag
On spreading your wings.
i have horribly strict parents who, although i am 22 years old, still feel that they must control where i go and what i do. i can’t be out past 9 at night and whenever i ask to leave the house with friends they get angry and tell me life isn’t about just partying. i’m a 4.0 student at school and i don’t drink or do drugs. how can i convince them to just let me live my...
Jun 16th
135 notes
1 tag
On what to do.
My mom is making me go to an indian reservation in the middle of nowhere with a quaker church to do community service. I have never been to church in my life and am pretty alienated by the whole thing. What the hell am I to do? Peyote.
Jun 16th
112 notes
2 tags
On purity rings.
I wear a ring to be faithful to god, and not have sex till marriage. im 18, and i’ve been in situations where its hard NOT to want to fuck the guy. Would it be wrong to have sex, and just say im still a virgin? Silly little girl, there is no god. No one cares about your virginity except for your parents and whatever boy is currently trying to fuck you. Your moral dilemma is a fabrication....
Jun 15th
704 notes
1 tag
On squirting.
I’m 21 and have been fucking since I was 15. Thing is, I recently started to ejaculate when I cum. Like, a lot. Every time. Without fail. Doesn’t matter if I’m masturbating or taking some dick, I actually squirt everywhere. Now, this isn’t a problem (in my opinion anyway - I fucking love it!) but when I get with a new guy, I feel I have to hold back an orgasm in case they...
Jun 15th
1 tag
On labels.
I am sleeping with a man who introduces me as his ‘friend’ to coworkers. We do more than just have sex. We watch movies. Go out to dinner. Basically try to have a relationship. What is your take on this? I hate to break it to you, but you’re the only one trying to have a relationship. He’s just trying to enjoy your company. Sure, he likes you. You might even get...
Jun 15th
71 notes
1 tag
On bible camp.
My parents are forcing me to go to bible camp for three days. I’m not religious at all. How can I make it more fun for me, if you know what I mean? Sex, drugs, and electronica are all welcome. I’m 15. You’ve got the right idea. I’m sure you’ll be fine. Hell, I remember bible camp. Fucking loved it. Those things are usually run by sappy, credulous neo-hippie Jesus...
Jun 14th
1 tag
On smoking.
When did you start smoking cigarettes? Do you think 14/15 is too young to start? If someone starts (well, me) at 14 (already started), is it possible to keep it under control or should I stop altogether? How do you smoke? Are you addicted? Please map this ground out for me because I’m lost. I had my first cigarette in a church camp bathroom, not coincidentally on the same night that...
Jun 8th
210 notes
1 tag
On fun sized advice.
If all jobs made the same salary, what would you do for a living? Start a capitalist revolution. What’s the best way to travel internationally with ecstasy? In a private jet. Are you afraid of getting old? No. I’m afraid of looking old. What’s a serious dealbreaker? No, no. That’s their thing. Do you believe in an afterlife or do you think this life is all we have? This...
Jun 7th
55 notes
1 tag
On not giving blowjobs.
So, my boyfriend wants me to give him a blowjob. I love him, and we’ve had sex, but they just really aren’t my thing. I told him no, and stood by it. Now he’s saying I’m a hypocrite, because he ate me out once. Am I being a hypocrite? I mean, I don’t think I’ll do it, even if I am, but still. Maybe he’ll hear it better from you. Oh, and just so you...
Jun 6th
182 notes
1 tag
On day drinking.
Is it okay to start drinking strawberry and lime cider at half 9 in the morning because im bored? Strawberry and lime cider? Am I big in Sweden or something? Are you fucking twelve? If you’re going to get hammered for breakfast, at least have the dignity to do it with real alcohol. Whiskey. Vodka. Beer if you must. Unless you’re poolside with Truman Capote, no self-respecting day...
Jun 6th
117 notes
On oil and blame.
What are your feelings on the recent oil spill? Whose fault do you think it is? I don’t have any feelings on the recent oil spill. Sure, I realize intellectually that it is a devastating event with dire environmental and economic consequences, but I’m an out-of-sight-out-of-mind kind of person. I don’t live on the gulf coast, and I can’t fake outrage. It’s not that...
Jun 6th
120 notes
On me.
I miss when you answered a lot of quality questions, as well as blogged with frequency. Yeah. Me too. I’ve been distracted. It’s hard to give a shit about the petty grievances of mostly retarded strangers when my own world is a bit topsy-turvy. I’m pretty sure I’ll be back soon.
Jun 1st
63 notes