August 2011
12 posts
On non-consent.
I just heard something really fucked up, and I need my rage to be validated.
During the school year a friend of mine took a drunk girl home from a bar and had sex with her. Later on that evening, he and his roommate switched, and his roommate proceeded to have sex with this girl, while she was passed out, without her knowing.
My “friend” thought that story was hilarious, I am...
1 tag
On a bitch and a cutter.
Dear Coquette,
My father has agreed that I shouldn’t have to attend church if I don’t want to, but I should find another morally enriching pastime to take up my Sunday mornings to help appease my religious mother’s rage. Any suggestions of altruistic ways for this 18-year-old to spend her time?
Volunteer at a hospital. Serve at a soup kitchen. Become a big sister. Don’t do it to appease...
On custom wedding vows.
My fiance and I nod our heads in agreement to everything you write. We would be honored if you were to assist us in writing our wedding vows for a very non-traditional, non-religious ceremony.
Fuck yeah. Email me your information.
1 tag
On basic polyamory.
Dear Coquette,
I’m a bisexual woman in a stable, long-term relationship with a man. He is very understanding and supportive of my sexuality, so much so that I’m free to be with women in whatever capacity I need. My problem is the guilt that comes with this freedom, and the worry that one day he will change his mind and that eating the proverbial cake will become the death of my relationship.
It...
2 tags
On fun sized advice.
Dear Coquette,
What do you do when your best friend is a home wrecker and a cheater? Pick better friends.
I love riding motorcycles but I feel tacky as hell wearing leather all the time, especially during summer. Advice? Sign your organ donor card.
Are you agnostic or an atheist? Yes.
Why does the future fill me with such dread and foreboding? Because you think the future actually exists.
...
On obvious advice.
Been with my boyfriend for two years. For the past 8 months, he’s become a jealous, self-involved mess. If it isn’t in his immediate interests, he doesn’t pay it any attention whatsoever. He decides what we see at the movies, where we eat out, what we talk about, etc. I’ve alerted him to it but, after many many crocodile tears and claims he’ll change, I’m still...
1 tag
On another pregnancy.
Dear Coquette,
A year ago, my husband and I lost our daughter while I was 36 weeks pregnant. We were and still are completely devastated, and to make matters worse, our wounds were re-opened just two months ago when I suffered the loss of another pregnancy.
My husband has a decent job and I am currently a full-time nursing student so although money can be tight, we get by and would have...
On a hustler.
I’m 20, I live in L.A and I make a relatively good living selling molly. While it pays off my loans better than any other job that’s available to me, I’d really like to start mapping out where I’d like to go career-wise. How the fuck do I do that? Where do I start?
Pick an industry. Start at the bottom. Hustle your way up. There is no magic, and that’s the only way...
On mortality, babies, and pills.
Dear Coquette,
I recently had an extra piece of gums removed from my mouth. I thought it was no big deal and didn’t worry about it. The biopsy came back, and it turns out it was a low-grade tumor. They removed all of it, I’ll be fine, but it still scares the crap out of me. I’m probably a huge baby for being so freaked out because there’s almost no health risk, but I’m 13 and have never had...
On not feeling guilty.
I cheated, but I don’t feel guilty. I really like the guy I’m with and I wasn’t looking for something more or different than what I already have. I’m not sure why I did it, but I feel like I probably will again. Is there something wrong with me? It seems everyone else is so sure cheating is wrong. I understand in theory, but I wouldn’t be upset if my guy messed around...
On a word burglar.*
Some dumb girl is posting your advice on her formspring acting as if she came up with it, haha look: http://www.formspring.me/lazyshark.
Sure enough, her name is Brianna, and for many months she has been plagiarizing my work on such a magnificent scale that I have little choice but to bend her over the internet and spank her ass raw.
Just to demonstrate how brazen she is, every word in this...
1 tag
On a fresh drinking problem.
Dear Coquette,
My best friend and I are both single after bad relationships; while my boyfriend was emotionally abusive, they broke up when her ex punched her in the face.
We made a joke of being slutty as possible this summer to spite our exes or something else that was logical after a couple drinks.
Unfortunately, I think she’s taking it too far.
She’s proceeded to morph into a drunken mess;...